Mum Friend: Sarah
Credentials: 1 X vaginal birth (2nd degree tear) 1 X caesarean birth (planned). Mastitis.
Home: Australia
Favourite Product for:
- Pregnancy – My Pregnancy body pillow!
- Birth – all the drugs they could give me!
- Postpartum – Nipple shields!
- Baby – Baby rocker.
Favourite motherhood quote/mantra:
“Everything is temporary. The good days are temporary but so are the bad days.”
*Said on repeat on the bad days*
Let me set the scene:
A much needed weekend get-away…
While on a little weekend get-away to a local holiday spot, my family and I were on the jetty one afternoon. We were keeping to ourselves, and there were another few people around – they would have to of been in their 60’s or so – they were quite merry – had clearly had a few vino’s under their belts, that’s for sure.
Now, as you know mummas, a baby in your arms is an instant talking point and is an instant ice-breaker when talking to strangers. I was holding my 3-month-old baby and it started with:
“Oh, she’s just gorgeous!”
“How old?”
…and so, our conversation began.
Are you a local?
I asked her…
“Nooo, no – just visiting our friends who live here.” She gestured towards a couple who were fishing off the other side of the jetty (drinks in hand).
Then it was her turn – “Do you live here?”
“Kind of,” I sheepishly said – we live close by but we just don’t get over here as often as we should, or as often as we’d like to – definitely need to take advantage of this amazing area more!”
As I said this, I suddenly realised how true this was and a wave of guilt came over me. The island was only a mere 40 minutes of travelling from home, yet we never really spent much time here. There was no excuse really as it was an easy place to get to even with two young kids.
She was the type of stranger that had that warm personality…easy to talk to – you know? Maybe the sincerity in her chat with me was coming from the way she smiled with her eyes or the fact that she had easily consumed a bottle of wine making her very friendly – either way, our chat seemed natural and she was nice so, I continued…
Stuck in a rut…
“Felt a bit stuck in a rut you know, especially in these last few months” (with a nod towards my 3-month-old daughter who was sleeping peacefully in a carrier on my chest). “I have been home a lot… so! At the start of the week, I said ‘that’s it!’ booked our 2-nights and here we are, out of the house for the entire weekend!
She smiled kindly, clearly sympathising with my sudden, probably over-share of information to…
“Oh” She sympathised. “It can be so easy to stay at home when you have littlies, but you just HAVE TO get out.” She went on…
“It was these guys over here…” (Pointing with her wine-glass in her hand to her friends who were throwing fishing lines off the jetty in the hope to “catch a big one” like my 3-year-old had been saying on REPEAT since we got there)
“… these guys are the ones who introduced us to the art of ‘taking your dinner out to eat’.”
I absolutely love talking to older generations about their experiences and getting advice from those who have been ‘there’ before so I looked at her with a keen interest for what she had to say next.
“… take it [dinner] to a park, to the beach – anywhere that gets you out of the house – even the backyard will do! We went to parks a lot” she said with a faraway look in her eyes that just beamed of fond memories that you could just tell she was instantly brought back to. “Cook a casserole and PICNIC UP! It will still be warm by the time you get there!”
I cannot quite reflect in writing how easy – breezy and casual she said this to me. It was not said in an instructive way either –
(Side note but as much as I do love hearing about the experiences of people who are from my parents and grandparent’s era’s– it is incredibly irritating when you get the vibes of [“we did this, you should be doing this too”] when they tell a story. I KNOW you know what I’m talking about mummas).
This woman, this stranger, was clearly saying this with love as she reflected on her own life and what helped her and her family avoid the mundane moments of everyday life and turn them into what is clearly some of her fondest memories.
“Yeah, wow… we will have to start doing this” I said slowly as the light bulb was turning on in my head.
“Yes, how about a Wednesday – a Wednesday seems like a good day doesn’t it – pack up your dinner and get out there. I’m sure there are loads of good parks around where you live!”
Again, she said this with not only so much kindness but also SO much enthusiasm and excitement for our future family dinner dates that I wondered briefly if I should ask her to come join us sometime!
Our NEW routine
So, a Wednesday it is.
Fast forward one year and even to this day, (almost) every Wednesday night, we pack up our dinner with 2 kids and “eat out”.
Our toddler absolutely loves it – the fresh air and the change of scenery from our dining table is fantastic for all of us! The funny thing is, for months I thought I was doing this more for my toddler. To create memories and mix-up our mundane week-day nights. But it was only just recently I realised the truth for this week-night ritual – it’s for me! To get me out of the house, to change the scenery FOR ME, to help me mix up MY mid-week-mundane routine as a semi-stay-at-home-mum.
Money Saver
I often apply this “take your dinner out to eat” advice for breakfasts and morning-teas too! It not only feels good to get out of the house but by taking our food with us, it saves money!
$7 for a small cappuccino? $25 for Avo on toast? No, thank you!
So, thank you to that lovely, albeit moderately intoxicated lady who helped to change our weekly routine forever. This small change in our every-day living has helped us to create more of our own precious memories as a family.
You are a bigger part of our lives than just that 5-minute friendly conversation we had on that jetty back in June 2022. You are a part of our weekly routine, too.